Archives for 2014

If you’re looking for a great Christmas gift for girlfriends, mothers, teachers … I have a recommendation for you.

Although I know the story, I emailed my friend, Sara, about 1/3 of the way in and said, “Sara, you are wooing my heart to the heart of God.” 

And, it’s true.

If you read Sara’s writing over at her blog or download her printables you know that the words she writes are treasures. 

You want a copy of this book.  And you will want to buy it for others.

If you’ve been tracking with Sara for awhile now, you know that she’s walked paths of bitterness — in marriage, in infertility, in perfectionism.  But what Sara does again and again and again is turn to God in the midst.  

Her writing is beautiful, raw, honest.  

By practicing adoration, especially when it doesn’t make sense, Sara shows us how to do the same.  

Reading EBTIS is a bit, for me, like going back through my scrapbook.  We walked together through the adoption process.  Actually it was through Sara that I first heard about Katya.  

We were at the airport when Eden and Caleb came home.  And they were waiting when Katya and I touched down at Dulles for the last time.  We prayed together. We worshipped together.

So, when I read EBTIS, I’m remembering what the Lord was doing in my life, in my heart … and it’s so precious to me.

But, even if this were not the case.  Even if snippets of the timeline of EBTIS sweet weren’t paralleled in my own journal, it would still be my story. 

Because this is what God wants to do in all of our lives.  He wants to make the bitter sweet.  He wants to exchange ashes for beauty. He wants to stir our hearts to adoration in a way that brings him glory and at the same time brings us so much joy.

So … if you haven’t gotten your copy of EBTIS, order it today.  Go ahead and order several, because you’re going to want to share it with others.  

And, if you’re not yet convinced.  Take 5 minutes and then see what you think.

 

And make REAL impact through Giving Tuesday, and Wednesday, and Thursday …

What might happen if we gave away as much money to really good causes as we spent on Black Friday and Cyber Monday?  What would that make possible?

Maybe you doubt that what you have to offer could possibly matter.  Every bit matters.  Every bit.  Even two copper coins.

Giving Tuesday is just one day

But maybe, just maybe over this Christmas Season we can join hands and give away much more than we buy.  Wouldn’t that be great?

I want to make this easy for you and highlight five organizations that are near and dear to my heart.  I’d love for you to consider making an investment in one or more.

Special Hope Network

Special Hope believes that every child matters. Their focus is children with intellectual and development disabilities in Zambia.  It’s run by dear friends of mine, Eric and Holly Nelson and Beth Bailey.  I could talk to you all day about these friends and their work.  Amazing!

Exodus Road

Exodus Road exists to empower the deliverance of sex slaves. They are working in partnership with multiple organizations and government offices to fight human trafficking.  Their two heartbeats are empowerment and collaboration.  Good stuff!

Sole Hope

Sole Hope is bringing health and hope to so many children in Uganda by getting jiggers out of their feet and shoes on their feet.  Piper and I are having a shoe cutting party in a couple of weeks and I can’t wait!

Help One Now

Help One Now is more than an organization. It’s a tribe of people committed to ending extreme poverty, caring for orphans, rescuing slaves, and seeing communities transformed by coming alongside local leaders. They believe that doing good should be simple.  Love it!

RiverCross

RiverCross has the world’s most vulnerable children as their focus.  Most of these children have experienced horrific trauma – exploitation, abuse, trafficking.  RiverCross is using radio drama to train caregivers to not only meet their basic needs, but to help them heal and bring them hope. How great is that?

I love all of these organizations. But I do need to let you know that you’ll be hearing much more from me about RiverCross in the weeks to come.  I can’t tell you all the details now.  But I am pretty excited!

So, check out these organizations and give to one, or two, or five.  Let’s blow the socks off of Cyber Monday and make REAL impact through Giving Tuesday and Wednesday and Thursday … 🙂

 

Or are they an invitation? 

I’m struggling a bit with thankfulness. Not in the “Woe is me. I don’t have anything to be thankful for” kind of a way.  But sort of the opposite.

I’m struggling with the “Why me?”

Why do I have a roof over my head when there are women sleeping under bridges?

Why do I have healthy children and there are sweet, sweet mamas by their babies in ICU?

Why do I have a car that runs, work I love, friends who speak grace and truth into my life, a husband who loves me?

One morning, early, I was driving to pray with a small group of women.  I rounded the interchange and a young woman stood there with her sign.

While I sat at the red light I fumbled through my bag for something, anything I could give to her.  I came up with a granola bar and a few dollars.

I rolled down the window, asked her name, and told I was so sorry she was in the situation. I wish I had more to give her, but this was all I had.

She smiled, told me her name, and thanked me.  The light turned green and I left her standing there waiting for the next window to roll down.  I was wrecked.

I arrived at my friend’s house … just a mess. “Why me?”

And as I’ve thought about it, I really don’t think that my relative prosperity and her relative poverty is evidence of God’s goodness.

Rather, I’m thinking that it’s evidence of God’s invitation.

 

An invitation to consider all the blessings I have and pour them out again, and again, and again.  An invitation to trust that the One whose given to lavishly to me, can give to others through me. An invitation to partner with God in showing His innate goodness to a hurting world.

Tonight I’m welcoming home my three daughters and my new son-in-law. They’ll come barreling into the house with enthusiasm and stories and so much fun.

Tomorrow we’ll pass out well-worn recipes and commence to cooking.  The house will be filled with the smells of cranberry sauce and cinnamon and the deliciousness of onions, and celery sautéing to tender on the stovetop.

Thursday we’ll welcome family and friends, old and new with roasted pecans and a cup of hot apple cider.  We’ll have a fire in the fire pit and football in the field behind our house. And we’ll finish the day with a slice of pumpkin pie.

To not be thankful for all of this would be beyond wrong.  But to hoard it and name it as evidence of God’s special favor upon me would be wrong.  It’s all just grace.  More honestly, it’s mercy.  

Are your blessings evidence of God’s goodness in your life?  Or are they something more? An invitation.

Tell me your story of invitation.  I’d love to hear it! Oh, and if you like what you’ve read, I would love it if you would subscribe.  The box is up and to the right.  Thanks!  Cindy

 

Last night Bill and I had dinner with good friends.  They’re a few years behind us with their five kids 12 and below.  If we joined forces, we’d have 12 kids from 21 to 5 months.  Needless to say, you can understand why we left them at home.

(Disclaimer: This picture is of the Lam Fam with us YEARS ago.  Just to give you a visual of what it’s like to go out to dinner with 12 kids.)

So, after a bit of catch up, they started asking questions, parenting questions.

“Do your kids bicker, or is it just us?”

“Will we ever sleep again?”

“What do y’all do about dating?”

“Does it really go by in the blink of an eye because the days seem really, really long?”

And then, the mother of all parenting questions … “Will we ever have sex again?”

And with these friends, we explored these questions.  ‘Cause they are friends.  AND because they asked.  But any one of these questions could start a war, or at least close down a friendship.

Because with some people, the answers might go something like this.

“Our kids don’t bicker.  It must just be you.  When they raise their eyebrows at each other, here’s what you do …”

“Well, you’d sleep better if Sarah, Sassy, and Sasha slept with you.  Co-sleeping.  That’s what we do and we are all so close now.”

“Dating? Our kids will never date.  They’ll court. If a guy wants to court my daughter, he has to be prepared to share his intentions with me and pay off the mortgage on his first house … in cash.”

“The days seem long to you?  For me they just sail by. Reading Are You My Mother 30 times each day gives me such joy.  I have such a sense of purpose in what I do.  I’m sorry that’s not your experience.”

“Sex? We can’t get enough of it.  Isn’t that what afternoon naps are for?”  😉 😉

Ridiculous, right? But, if we’re really honest, we all want a parenting prescription.  We want a parenting pill that is going to make our kids behave, and eat their vegetables, and play nicely with their sister.

We want to know that if we do X and Y then we’re going to get Z.  We want a parenting prescription that is going to promise us that it’s all going to turn out just fine.  But, it just doesn’t work that way.

The best parenting advice I know comes in the vernacular of my 18 year old’s texting lingo.  Are you ready?  Here it is.

UBU

In case you don’t read text, I’ll translate that.  You be you.

“If co-sleeping with Sarah, and Sassy, and Sasha works for your family … go for it. UBU.”

“If you’ve trained your kids to respond to your raised eyebrow … fabulous. UBU.”

“If you’ve figured out how to fry up bacon in the pan every single afternoon … you go, girl. UBU.”

UBU. But don’t put all that on me.  And don’t put it on anyone else either. Don’t give me your parenting prescriptions. 

God chose you to be the mother of your children.  And, if you’re married, he chose your husband to be their father.

Together, the two of you talk about your personality, your preferences, what makes you together as a couple unique.  Talk about what is fun for you, what makes you mad, what makes you sad.  Talk about your quirks, and your characteristics, and all the beauty of who you together are.

If you’re doing this single, first of all, oh my goodness.  You have my utmost respect.  Second of all, spend some time thinking through these things by yourself.  Or better yet, with a friend who knows you well.

Decide to stop looking for parenting prescriptions and simply let UBU.  And let all of this beauty spill into the lives of your children.

So, there’s my best parenting advice.  UBU and ditch the parenting prescriptions.  What do you think?

Today is World Orphans Day.

Pretty soon the catalogs and appeal letters will begin arriving in your mailbox that signal the push for year-end giving.

Some of them will be from organizations that you love and support.  You’ll be thrilled to thumb through the pages holding pictures of ducks, and sheep, and rabbits.  You’ll begin to pray as a family whether to give $79 to a water filtration system to help a village or 13 small animals to nourish a family.

But some of  the letters and packets you receive will make you wonder how you ended up on their mailing list and they’ll go right in the trash.

We want our dollars to make a difference.  Here are 7 questions to help you make your donations count.

1. Does the cause align with my passion?

My heart beats most strongly for the cause of women and children, particularly orphans and widows  Although there are plenty of good causes out there, this is the cause that most deeply stirs my heart.  What are the causes that line up with your passion?

2. Does it offer help in the name of Christ?

This one is a bit tricky because I do believe that there is so much value in simply helping people.  Think about the “good Samaritan.”  In the name of good, decent, humanity, we should help each other.  But if I have a choice, I am going to choose to support an organization that is offering help in the name of Christ. Is this important to you?

3. Does the organization highlight beauty?  

Although there are terrible situations in the world, I appreciate an organization that doesn’t just show the horror, but also shows the beauty of the people they serve, values their dignity, and gives them honor.  Do the organizations you support value the people they are serving?

4. Is there focused vision? 

Before I make a contribution, I need to see that the organization has a clear focus.  Too many organizations suffer from vision drift and end up scattered and ineffective.  I’d much rather donate to an organization that has a laser beam focus than one that generally helps people.

5. Is local leadership empowered?

 For me, this is key.  I’m looking for organizations that don’t come in and tell people what they need.  Rather, they listen to the needs of the people, partner with them, and build up local leadership.  Do the organizations that you support empower local leadership?

6. Will my dollars be multiplied?

Rather than a dollar-for-dollar return on my investment, I’m looking for organizations that will multiply my dollars.  This may look like financing micro-loans, or supporting training for local leaders, or providing chickens that will lay eggs.  How important is multiplicity to you?

7. Is there relational involvement? 

I may give a one-time gift to an organization in which I have no personal connection, but I’m more likely to really get behind an organization where I know someone, or I know someone who knows someone.  I’m interested in relational involvement, not just funding someone else’s mission.  Do you have personal connection with the organizations you support?

What questions do you ask when you are considering making a donation?  Please leave a comment, and also feel free to leave a link to the organizations that you wholeheartedly endorse.

Are you with me here?

While orphans are going hungry and girls are getting trafficked, I’m being buried in 6th grade math.

Can you relate?

So this is life.  I tried to go to Malaysia.  I really did.  I said, “Lord, I will  go ANYWHERE.”  I wanted to get rid of all of my stuff and go.

But, here’s the deal.  God said, “No.”

He said, “I’m putting you right here in North Carolina where you grew up, where your husband grew up,  where there are people who have known you for a million years.”

And so here I am.

And I’m being buried under the tyranny of 6th grade math.

But, isn’t this where we all are?

While our hearts are broken up about girls in Nigeria, and crazy ISIS stuff, and Ferguson, MO … we have to do 6th grade math.  We have to sit with our amazing children and remember how to divide fractions, and calculate probability, and walk them through long division AGAIN.

And I think.  This is what lasting impact is all about. 

Wherever you are.  In Malaysia, or Zambia, or Ukraine, or Columbia, or North Carolina … shine.

Shine bright.  Shine with the light of Christ.

And don’t let anything, even 6th grade math defeat you.

Love you!

Cindy

With the courier waiting nervously, Philemon sits down to read the letter from his mentor and good friend, Paul. He misses him so much.

Paul, a prisoner for Christ Jesus…

Philemon hates that this man, this brother, is imprisoned in Rome.  He has given so much to so many, poured his life out to tell people about Jesus.  Before Philemon reads any further, he stops and prays for Paul.

Strengthen him, Lord. Be with him.  Open the way, God, for him to clearly tell others about you.

As Philemon reads on, he’s warmed by Paul’s prayers, his affirmation.  But then the tone changes slightly.

Though I am bold enough in Christ to command you to do what is required, yet for love’s sake I prefer to appeal to you — I, Paul, an old man and now a prisoner also for Christ Jesus — I appeal to you for my child, Onesimus.

Philemon’s eyes narrow.  For my child, Onesimus.  And he realizes why that courier looks familiar.  Pacing in the adjacent room is his runaway slave, Onesimus. The long buried splinter feels as if it pierced his skin just yesterday.

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What would it be like if we could get to moms and dads before things got so rough that they had to give up their children?

What would it be like if we could listen and learn what causes a dad or mom to make this terrible choice?

What would it be like if our support of these families arose from what they say that they need, rather than what we decide that they need?

Chris Marlow and a team from Help One Now are heading to Ethiopia TODAY to spend time with an entire community of families where the children are at risk of becoming orphans.

They are working to help families stay together.  Helping families stay together by preempting orphan status.

I love this.  And I love Help One Now. 

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Our daughter, Katya, has a splinter or two buried deep.  But really, don’t we all?

A splinter buried deep gets covered with skin, but it’s still there.  It might work itself out eventually.  Or it might get infected.  But, if it stays buried long enough, the surrounding tissue will harden holding onto to that splinter making it so very difficult to tease out.

And I’m wondering, do you have splinter buried deep?

Think back. When the splinter first penetrated, it hurt, at first.  May have even made you angry or cry. But you buried it deep, let the skin cover over. You’ve gone on with life.  And it looks like all is well.

But all is not well.

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